Stood on the sand a fine figure he cut,
Un-tethered, back leathered, preparing to strut.
Characteristically nodding his head for good measure,
This I could see was his business and pleasure.
Impressed was I by his jib,
This descendant of Jesus’ ride to his crib,
Stood patiently by,
“£1.50”said he “Bugger me, if you please.”
The entrepreneurial mule turned his head.
“Beg pardon young lad, wind it back just a tad, and kindly repeat what you said.” he said.
“£1.50 said I, bugger me by and by, that’s mighty steep for a jaunt. Good God in heaven, this is Scarborough not Devon.”
And the scallywag continued his taunt.
“I’d expect to pay less and in fact I confess, I’ve only got 50p. And things as they stand (alluding to his reprimand) I demand a reduction for me!”
Now the entrepreneurial mule suffers no fools,
But deliberated the request word for word.
After calculating his sums, while humming (he hums)
He concluded the proposition absurd.
“ Young fellow” he intoned and audibly groaned,
(A groan I felt worthy of mention!)
“I’ve costs to meet, I can offer a seat, but for no less…”
And then he paused just for tension.
And tense so it was and not just because of the things that were said afore,
It’s what happened next, it was aimed just to vex,
The fat boy performed a mocking hee-haw.
But the entrepreneurial mule suffers no fools,
He knew this was just a bargaining ploy.
A mere juvenile’s crack to throw him of track,
So he calmly countered the boy.
“One pound – off the ground, round the bay, up the mound, a quick paddle and back where we started. I’ll go for no less, for in all fairness, you’re not the lightest load I’ll have carted.”
And with that he stepped back, aware of the punch he had packed,
(He is famed for his negotiating aplomb).
He then pondered if the kid, had the money well hid, or if he’d have to go ask his Mom.
But the cheeky young tyke, dug deep as you like, in his pockets, as deep as a diver,
And without a trace of disgrace on his little fat face, he asked for change for a fiver.