Uh-huh. The a,b,c of faking it.

My daughter is now talking. More and more everyday. New words splurge out of her little face hole, on a  daily basis. Seemingly without end. Or reason. Wifey and I are of course as proud as any good parents would be. Should be. We smile inanely at each other, wrinkling our noses, as our beautiful … [Read more…]

Living with chickens

`You can’t gift wrap a chicken so I did not have the element of surprise. I do have a magician friend and I suppose were he to have lived locally, he could probably have taught me the slight of hand necessary to produce a flapping bantam from my trousers. But alas he lives in Bedford and … [Read more…]

I am not QI

Last night I was questioned extensively by a QI man trying desperately to find a mutual interest; a patch of common ground on which we could both comfortably stand. He was unsuccessful. But he was resilient. He is one of nature’s talkers. He has a lot to say, which is fine by me because I … [Read more…]

Dirty secrets unearthed

Dear men, It’s late. You are downstairs and everyone else has gone to bed. It’s dark. It’s warm. It’s cosy. You’ve have had a long day and  a few drinks. You have a remote control in your hand that links you to a cabled network of  hundreds of HDTV channels. You are bored. You flick … [Read more…]

Columbo

I have not really written exclusively about my daughter on this blog as of yet.  Pretty much because up to now she has done nothing of note that is worth blogging about. Second child and all that. I suppose the only interesting thing about her, as far as I am concerned, is that from the very moment of … [Read more…]

Who’d like to see Pa on the computer?

I wanted to make my mark you understand. I wanted to do something my children would remember and enjoy. I  wanted a sticker for being a ‘Good Daddy’. I have, I fear, inadvertently led my children by the hand down the path to Cyberphbobia. As it was the first time we had ever Skype’d before, there was a … [Read more…]

I live to tell the tale….

I survived – Mazeltov and Huzzah! (If this statement leaves you perplexed, read this earlier post and then return to this…for continuity you understand) After 3 (THREE) different nurses were unable to find my veins….. Them: Have you ever had problems being able to find your veins before? Me: No? They’ve always been there. In … [Read more…]

Hot innit

The sun is as high as an elephant’s eye. The sky is so, so blue. So why am I sat inside thinking of starting a blog? Is it because I am avoiding moving the lawn?  (partly) Is it because I am by nature a pasty white/blue skinned man who dare not even say melanoma for … [Read more…]